Def Leppard

According to a recent news story, a 72-year-old beat down a twentysomething mugger who tried to swipe $300 from him at a gas station in Michigan. This only proves that old dudes can still kick ass. Of course, that old dude is an ex-Marine and former Golden Gloves boxer.

This brings us to the pairing of Def Leppard and Styx, two veteran rock bands that used to sell out arenas in three seconds flat. But these days both groups have been reduced to summer nostalgia tours and crummy covers albums like Def Lep's Yeah! and Styx's Big Bang Theory.

The Leppard unquestionably kicked ass from 1981, when the group dropped High 'n' Dry, to 1992's Adrenalize. Like that ex-Marine, there's always the possibility that the Leppard could dig deep and smack down an audience. Styx, however, never kicked ass. And with original frontman Dennis DeYoung out of the picture, the group is about as legit as a Steve Perry-less Journey and Foreigner minus Lou Gramm. If these geezers manage to kick ass tonight, it'll be the lead story on CNN.